Shot Through The Heart And You're To Blame
by snarksadoodle
Summary: "Why in StarClan's name would I trust you? You betrayed me. You were the one who left me alone. You were the one who abandoned me. You were the one who dishonored everything we had as kits. You were the one who chose Swanpaw." When trust is put to the test in a crumbling relationship, will love overcome all? Or will someone get shot through the heart and never get back up?


"Alright. Our next assignment will involve partners. Riverpaw and Creekpaw, you'll be Team One. Swanpaw and Puddlepaw, you're Team Two. Sandpaw with Bluepaw will be Team Three."

Six small shapes situated themselves in front of a bulky white tom, the total group of seven residing behind an outcropping of mixed stones and sand just a few tail lengths from the shoreline. Huddled in the shade, paws tingled with anticipation, eyes wide with eagerness. Successfully completing today's task not only ensured you were ready for your warrior assessment, but it also tested your abilities to work in partner pairs- a trait that was most often found in OceanClan cats.

"Hidden within a small copse of trees over near the ridge, is an object worth retrieving. It's up to you to decide what you think that object is. Regardless, the task is to fetch this item for me and bring it back to camp. The first team to return to the clearing with it, will be announced as the winners. Any questions?" The white tom scrutinized his pupils with narrowed yellow orbs, carefully reading their expressions.

Amused. Annoyed. Confident. Shy. Arrogant. Energetic.

"Good." He nodded, satisfied as the six remained silent save for the shuffling of their paws or tails against the grainy flooring. As no one moved, the thick furred tom gave them all a confused stare. "Well? What are you waiting for? Go."

Needing no other helpful hints, the group bolted from their spot, kicking sand and tiny pebbles in their wake as they charged ahead towards the named direction. Their tails streamed behind them like flags, their bodies nothing more than colored blurs as they raced against the wind, never faltering. As thin blades of grass came into view, the sight of stunted trees quickly followed. Pawsteps thundered against the ground as it morphed into solid earth, the sun bleached grass crunching beneath each paw placement. Sudden shadows descended upon their pelts as they charged into the woods, a mixture of dark and light dappling their fur.

Six single felines shifted into their respective teams; a flash of silver leading away a gray tabby, black being led to the right courtesy of white, and a sandy tabby staying straight and true with a blue-gray at his side.

"Alright Bluepaw," the sandy tabby meowed, easily keeping his breathing under check unlike his struggling companion. "You and I both know how this works; my speed is superior but I'll need your stealth to back me up. I'll go on ahead, you keep a safe distance and guard me from any attacks once I've got this so called 'object worth retrieving'."

The blue-gray tom pulled back, breathing tight as he watched the long furred tabby streak away. "Of course," he said, just out of earshot. _I'll always be your guardian angel._

With his partner slinking among the shadowed foliage, Sandpaw willed his legs to move faster up the incline, determined to reach it well before the others. It was often touched upon how fast he was compared to the other apprentices, much to their disdain. The majority scorned him with insults. Only Bluepaw treated him differently.

 _"So you're the fastest? That's great!"_

 _"I've got the speedster for my friend!"_

 _"Oh don't listen to Riverpaw. What does she know?"_

 _"They're just jealous. Don't let their mean words get to you."_

 _"Stay true to yourself. Everyone's got a talent. They'll just have to endure emotional torture until they find theirs."_

Sandpaw shook his head violently, thrashing it mercilessly back and forth until his thoughts about his sapphire-eyed companion drifted from his mind completely. _Focus on the task at paw, Sandpaw, for StarClan's sake!_ he berated himself, emerald green optics narrowed with irritation for allowing himself to get so distracted. _Bluepaw should be the furthest thing from your mind. Right now, you need to pay attention. This object of Waverunner's has got to be close by. I just have to keep a sharp lookout._

As he cleared the ridge, a sparkle caught the corner of his eyes. To the far right sat a shimmering pool of water, bits of sunlight reflecting off its glassy surface. Floating in the center lay a lily pad which seemed to be the base supporting something long, thin and brown.

A crash from his left brought him back to reality, a pure white blur streaking into view, making a beeline for the pond.

 _Swanpaw!_ he thought with aggravation, willing himself to move forward after her. _I let myself be captivated by beauty and look who's here to steal the prize from under my nose! But where's Puddlepaw?_

"Grawr!" a black tom leapt from the surrounding flora, tackling Sandpaw to the ground in order to let Swanpaw fly into the pond with a mighty splash. He spotted the white furred 'paw snag the prize with a quick swipe of her jaws, already veering back towards the edge where she could crawl out.

 _This was supposed to be our plan!_ Sandpaw griped, finding Puddlepaw surprisingly bulky.

"I've got it!" Swanpaw's muffled cry sounded from the boundary between the open clearing and the treeline, awaiting the return of her partner. As the large tom started to pull away, a screech resonated through the trees, silver fur barreling into Swanpaw's slim form, knocking her back as well as the object out of her grip.

"Riverpaw you swine!" Sandpaw heard Swanpaw throw out insults as the two locked in combat, Puddlepaw retreating in hopes to rescue his teammate. Creekpaw's fluffy tabby form swerved into view, colliding with Puddlepaw. Save for Sandpaw, all cats were engaged in deep combat with one another. Because of their inability to escape, no one had the chance to escape with the object sitting untouched in the center of the hissing felines.

However, Sandpaw had the chance.

Slinking closer, ducking a swipe or two that missed its mark, the sandy tabby planned his escape, hopefully with the prize in paw. But as a sudden blow came to his muzzle, he was forced to back up to avoid getting caught up in the scuffle. Straightening out his blurred senses, he noticed a small figure of blue sneaking closer, undetected by the fighting apprentices. Sandpaw couldn't help but smile.

 _Go for it, Blue. I'll distract them._

Yowling, he rammed Creekpaw at full force, sending the tabby sprawling into Swanpaw. The battlefield became a jumble of writhing and snarling, fighting against gravity to stand back up on their paws. By the time Riverpaw lunged, Bluepaw's tail disappeared through the fronds, giving Sandpaw no reason to delay. Whirling on his paws, he went full thrust, charging out of the clearing within seconds.

"They've got the object, you hollowed out hermit crabs! Go get them!" Riverpaw's angry howl was easily heard above the blood rushing to his ears. Glancing ahead with emerald optics, Bluepaw's form came into view. With the item clamped firmly in his tiny jaws, the panicking 'paw was rushing at full speed, his plumed tail imitating a banner caught in the wind. Paws pounding against the solid earth turning to sand once again, Sandpaw caught up with his pair with a few well timed leaps. He noticed Bluepaw's stride faltering and pushed his muzzle out, gingerly switching the object between them.

Relief washed over Bluepaw's dark sapphire gaze, gratitude shimmering within those murky pools reflected at Sandpaw's dazzling emeralds. Bluepaw's shaking crown gave a little bob, granting Sandpaw the access to sprint back to camp solo. Without reluctance, Sandpaw streaked off, kicking particles of his pelt color up into the blustery air. Ahead of him mere fox lengths away lay the reed bed which was the first step to getting inside the camp. He darted through, the thin stalks parting like the red sea as the tom surged forward. As he broke through to the other side, he didn't even pause to maneuver around the stones alongside the narrow stream. Unable to break his own stride, Sandpaw hurled himself up onto the rock base, paw scrambling to inch closer to central camp. Tumbling down the final stretch of grass and granite, a heavy panting Sandpaw found himself shuddering with exhaustion in front of the large white tom.

He spat out the object, looking up wearily at Waverunner with a strained smile. Waverunner replied with a nod of approval, ears perked as the remaining five paused at the rocky ridge, out of breath and clearly infuriated excluding Bluepaw whose eyes shown with pride.

"Ah frog dung and fish guts!" Riverpaw exclaimed, scoring deep nicks into the stone beneath her paws. "They got here first. If you all hadn't been such empty shells, you would've noticed they made off with the prize!"

"Now now Riverpaw, now is not the time to be scolding your clanmates," Waverunner beckoned them all closer. Bluepaw was the first to dash down the slope, tackling Sandpaw in a display of joyful admiration. Pinning down the taller tom, Bluepaw stared down at the latter with a bright smile, suddenly touching noses.

Sandpaw blinked, eyes wide as realization caught up with him. "Not here," he growled, almost inaudibly as he shoved the tinier tom aside. He watched Bluepaw wince and nod, quietly murmuring, "Right. Sorry."

Luckily, no one seemed to catch their sudden show of affection, the other apprentices already gathering around Waverunner and the object of interest.

"A stick?!" Creekpaw sounded irritated as they finally observed what lay at the large warrior's paws. "You had us gallivanting around the forest for a stick?!"

Waverunner chuckled. "Not just any stick. Look closer. Notice anything?"

"It's part of a willow tree."

"Very good Swanpaw," Waverunner praised her. "But this isn't just any willow tree. It's a part of the Star Willow."

Gasps.

"Like _the_ Star Willow? As in the Star Willow beside the pool where we connect with StarClan?"

"Right again, Swanpaw. I see someone's been paying attention to my lessons," the white tom chuckled. "And it is said that the willow tree itself holds magical properties that only StarClan themselves can comprehend. And since Team Three- Bluepaw and Sandpaw returned with the blessed branch, they will be granted a special place under StarClan's watch. Good teamwork you two. I look forward to your warrior assessments in the near future." Waverunner delicately lifted the holy branch from the ground, padding towards the medicine den after a nod of departure. "Carry on."

"Fish guts," Riverpaw aimed her glare at Bluepaw and Sandpaw once she was out of earshot from the hefty warrior. "That prize was supposed to be mine."

"Give it a rest, Riverpaw," Sandpaw feigned a yawn, trying to look modest in front of the others. "Some cats are just destined for greatness. Some just aren't."

Giving him a nasty look, the silver streaked she-cat stormed off in a huff, obviously internally scorned as she was shown up by another apprentice. Her thin tail lashed side to side, another addition to her humiliation and pressure to perform.

Eyes rolling and a few scattered scoffs later, the small group had dispersed leaving Bluepaw and Sandpaw alone in the sectioned clearing. Once left to their own devices, Bluepaw whirled his head around to stare up at the taller tom. His eyes shimmered, tail twitching.

"Now?" he mewed impatiently, as if struggling to sit for more than a minute. His features contorted into a kit-like pout, determined to get his way.

"Don't be so impatient, you overgrown kit," grumbled Sandpaw, reluctantly nosing his muzzle forward expectantly. Teeth flashed from a grin as the blue-gray collided his black nose to Sandpaw's berry pink. This was about the only affection Sandpaw allowed from Bluepaw, too embarrassed to display any of the other signals that pairs in love typically flaunted. Just yesterday, Frogjaw and Sedgecreek settled outside of camp, tails entwined as they lapped at each other's faces in quite an expressive demonstration of passion. The little sand tabby had walked in on them early afternoon to ask Frogjaw about battle practice. Upon spotting their intense activities, Sandpaw's stomach churned with disgust before quickly excusing himself. From that point, he imagined him and Bluepaw in that situation and just couldn't accept it without feeling a mixture of sick and embarrassed. It was wrong on so many levels. Forget having a relationship with someone from another Clan; Bluepaw and Sandpaw's relationship was flat out insane, and surely worthy of an exile of ever discovered. And from the first day they accepted their feelings, it was agreed that their entire togetherness would be considered a secret.

Overtime, Sandpaw noticed Bluepaw getting antsy. He was desperate for attention and a daily nose touch wasn't going to satisfy his needs. Bluepaw even threatened to let their status go public if he wasn't allowed to share a nest. Sandpaw himself was desperate, but in the opposite way. Desperate to keep their relationship unnoticed, he reluctantly agreed and allowed Bluepaw to share his nest for the next quarter-moon. To keep from arousing suspicion, this only took place once everyone in the den was asleep as well as waking up early so the others wouldn't see their compromising position. They were caught only once by Swanpaw but with some explaining that Bluepaw was merely cold, the white she-cat seemed to let it slide without further questioning.

Pulling back, Sandpaw beckoned Bluepaw to follow. "Walk with me," he said simply, aiming for the rocks that led away from camp.

"If we're going to be together, we should start acting like it," Bluepaw complained once they lept over the thin stream, out of earshot from any potential eavesdroppers.

"I know you don't like it, but think of the consequences," Sandpaw griped, trying to knock some sense into Bluepaw's empty skull as their pace began to quicken through the field of reeds. "If we're caught, think of what will happen. We'd be shunned- maybe even banished! Tell me, in the history of the Clans, have you ever heard the story of two cats of the same gender in love?"

Bluepaw's head shook.

"That's because it doesn't exist!" Sandpaw hissed angrily, stopping as sand brushed on their paws, the array of stalked foliage behind them. "According to laws of reproduction, a tom and a tom doesn't make sense. If we're to help our Clan grow, we have to find a suitable mate. Tom to she-cat, she-cat to tom."

"W-what are you saying?" Bluepaw felt his throat hitch, the airway blocked for a mere second.

"Oh come on, surely you can understand what I'm trying to say here," Sandpaw groaned, growing tired of the innocent act. "I've said it in the nicest way possible but I suppose I have to be more straightforward. To put it bluntly, Bluepaw, we're done. Walk yourself back." With no more words to be said, Sandpaw turned on his heels, stalking back through the reed bed without looking behind him.

Twas a real shame, too. For if he bothered to steal a glance over his shoulder, he would've seen the glassy surface of Bluepaw's wide, moon-shaped optics. He would've seen the heartache in his expression alone, threatening to open the floodgates and cue the waterworks. He would've seen his body tremble, jaw slack with lack of understanding. He would've heard a quiet chirp of dismay, trailed by the the final shudder before the inevitable collapse against the sand.

He would've.

But he didn't.

* * *

"You're so funny!" Swanpaw giggled, her girly voice shrill and squeaking with excitement.

"Oh I've got tons more," Sandpaw boasted, seated outside the apprentice den with the bubbly 'paw. She certainly lived up to her name- her pure white fur the same color as a swan.

"Why haven't we hung out before?" Swanpaw's laughter settled down as she wiped her eyes with a snowy forepaw. "Oh yeah, it's because you've always spent every waking moment with Bluepaw. But why the sudden urge to spend time with me?"

Sandpaw hid a wince, not willing to bring up the true reasons. "We both decided to broaden our friendship. We've been best friends since kithood and after spending so much of our time together, it was decided that we'd try to make some new friends. You're my first choice." He hoped his smile was genuine and not forced, still regrettably thinking about Bluepaw who had yet to return. An hour or so had passed by since Sandpaw made it back to camp alone and the younger 'paw still hadn't made his grand entrance over the rocks and into the clearing with his typical Bluepaw grin.

"Aww, really?" the pretty she-cat ducked her head, furiously running her paw over her ears out of embarrassment. "You know, you're pretty nice."

"And you're pretty...pretty," Sandpaw couldn't stop his voice, suddenly realizing what had just left his mouth. _Oh stop it! The quicker you move on, the quicker he will too and then you can both move on with your lives. Getting close to Swanpaw will ensure the fact that I can detach myself from Bluepaw without regrets.  
_

Swanpaw looked heavily flushed and couldn't speak for several moments, unable to form even simple words. "Thanks," she finally gasped out, timidly smiling.

 _Not as cute as Bluepaw's,_ Sandpaw's subconscious decided without a second glance. "Hey, um," he cleared his throat, not bothering to argue with his mind knowing it would get him nowhere. "Want me to go grab some fresh kill? I think there might be some carp and we can share it. That is, if you wouldn't mind?"

"That...that sounds wonderful," a soft smile graced her features, her pure pelt giving her the essence of an angel glimmering in the fading sunlight. Still, as beautiful as she was, Sandpaw's heart couldn't- or rather wouldn't- melt at the sight, no matter how hard he willed it. His stomach knotted with guilt, twisting and writhing as if he'd done something wrong.

 _But I didn't!_ He felt the need to justify his actions once again. _I was simply letting nature take its course. He needs to grow up and understand that me and him wouldn't work. Anatomically as well as personality wise. We just don't match each other. And the sooner he gets that through his defiant little head, the better off both of us will be. I've done nothing but the right thing._

Sauntering over to the prey heap, littered with fish of all colors and sizes- from trout to minnows- Sandpaw gingerly plucked a carp from near the base. Barely sinking his teeth into its scaly hide, he tugged it out from its lodgings among the other former swimming species. But while doing so, it managed to alter the pile's balance in which the heap itself began to topple, the majority flopping backwards where it smacked against Mudshark's grizzled head. The old brown tom yowled with surprise, tripping over his own paws and landing in a supine position, forepaws shielding his face from any more unpredictable ambushes.

"Invasion! Invasion!" the aging elder croaked, voice scratchy and dry from age. "BlizzardClan invasion! We're all doomed!"

"It's OK, Mudshark," a younger brown tom tottered over, his long, prominent whiskers twitching. "BlizzardClan isn't invading. They haven't invaded in moons anyways. Not since before Their Journey. Come on," he helped the elder to his paws from off his back, trying to coax the calmness back to his frail beating heart. Still hyperventilating, the scraggly brown feline was led away back towards the frond barrier marking the elders den. Motionless, Sandpaw remained by the disassembled mountain. As the two brown furred cats disappeared through the draping foliage, the realization snapped back into place, reminding him of his mission.

Whirling around in a single, fluid motion, his bright green spheres locked straight onto the eye-catching form of a peaceful, deep in thought Swanpaw currently gazing off into the distance. The dwindling light reflected from her eyes of golden liquid honey, in which if you were to stare at them too long, you'd be trapped in the sticky substance, but satisfied with its tantalizing sweetness. That same sweetness that was a delicious craving- a desire. As the sun began its daily descent behind the distant mountains where another Clan made their home, Sandpaw felt a wave of fatigue rush through his body.

"Hey," he greeted the she-cat as he trotted over, settling his catch down at her delicate paws. "It's getting late and I was wondering if you wouldn't mind sharing this inside?" His slender crown nodded towards the apprentice den. Much to his pleasure, Swanpaw agreed, and pursued the bronze marked tabby inside behind the lining of reeds. Sandpaw beelined for his nest, spinning around in circles to massage the moss into the comfiest sleeping shape. As the moss shifted itself into the perfect form, the thin furred tabby crouched in preparation to settle in completely. Once he felt fur brushing against his own, a jolt of adrenaline flashed through his blood, heart rate escalating at the sudden body contact. His head whipped around to stare at Swanpaw who held the carp in her jaws. Setting it down outside the mossy nest, she gave him a weird look.

"What?" she said, confused.

Sandpaw shook his head. "It's nothing. How about we just eat?" He scooted over some more inside his nest- the same nest that had been recently remodeled to fit both Sandpaw and Bluepaw within it. He watched a cute smile twist its way onto her muzzle as she established a comfortable spot in the mossy refuge, curling up tightly beside her new friend she was growing more attached to. Within moments, the two had comfortably nestled in, quietly munching on their evening snack before sleep finally overcame their vacant minds.

* * *

"Bluepaw, are you OK? You're looking a little out of it," Briarnose commented out of concern, observing the blue-gray stare distantly off into space, appearing lost. Bluepaw, Sandpaw, and the rest of the apprentices gathered beside the stream with a brindle patterned she-cat, awaiting their morning assignment. Sandpaw shot a sideways glance to his former lover, who snapped his head to attention with a blank expression.

"Huh?" Lack of sleep hung around his eyes, looking droopy and half-lidded. "No, I'm alright. Just uh, tell us what to do."

Uncertainty remained in the warrior's gaze, but none to less, she continued to relay instructions. "Today's mission will be a hunting test with partner skills. Pairs will be as follow; Riverpaw and Creekpaw, Sandpaw and Bluepaw- "

"Excuse me," Swanpaw cleared her throat, interrupting the speaking warrior. "Shouldn't we broaden our skills with different partners? After all, it's impossible to verify who will end up with who in the heat of battle and it's important to understand your teammate's strengths and weaknesses."

Briarnose nodded thoughtfully as if in agreement. "A valid point. In that case, Puddlepaw with Creekpaw, Bluepaw with Riverpaw, and that leaves Swanpaw paired to Sandpaw. Take any portion of the territory and proceed to hunt. The goal is to bring back two fish and one bird each. You're all dismissed."

Rather than bolting like yesterday, the pairs split in a leisurely pace in different directions. The Puddlepaw and Creekpaw and Creekpaw duo circled round further up the stream as a first dibs, leaving Swanpaw and Sandpaw with the forest near the edge of their land. Only Bluepaw and Riverpaw remained at the meeting place once Brairnose disappeared back over the rocks. Riverpaw sighed with exasperation, "Come on, they've probably taken all the good spots so we'll try the shoreline for a seabird or something." As she turned to pad away, her line of vision landed back on the tom who hadn't moved much less registered her suggestion.

"Look, Bluepaw," she let out a deeper, drawn out sigh. "I know you and Sandpaw were close, but Briarnose said we're partners. You'll see him again after our assignment in finished."

The mentioned apprentice made no further motion to move, flicking his tail against the grainy soil. His downcast gaze left unwavering at his paws, dusty and dry from the mixture of sand and heat. Remaining mute, Bluepaw's fur rustled in the light, revealing a worn, unkempt pelt full of knots and tangles. He was an absolute disaster. If left like this without attending, Riverpaw herself would feel a pang of guilt.

"Rutting fish head," she grumbled, shuffling back with her own head hung down. If anyone saw how low she'd become...Besides, her pride wouldn't allow such a thing. Plopping down highly unceremoniously, she cast a sideways glance to her equally moody mission partner. "Alright. Go on," Riverpaw huffed out. "You can talk. Don't worry, I'll listen. Just tell me what's on your mind."

"Nothing that you could ever understand," Bluepaw's body jerked, turning away from the silvery she-cat.

Rather than pursue this in an aggressive manner, Riverpaw took the conversation to another turn. "It's because of love, isn't it?" When Bluepaw snapped his head to look at her with astonishment, the other 'paw chuckled. "You think I wouldn't understand because you think I haven't experienced love? Sorry to disappoint you, but once you've felt it yourself, it's hard not to feel it in others."

"W-Who?" Bluepaw's voice quivered, almost afraid to ask who had once held the heart of the often cranky Riverpaw.

"Swanpaw," Riverpaw sighed wistfully, voice full of longing as her slender crown tilted up towards the cloudless sky, obsercing the sea of endless blue.

Had Bluepaw been eating, he surely would've choked as Riverpaw's secret was revealed. "You love _Swanpaw?_ "

"Is that so hard to believe?" Riverpaw's crown tilted as she turned to face him, blinking faintly innocent orbs. "You love Sandpaw, don't you?"

"Whoa whoa whoa there," Bluepaw was quick to defend himself. "I'll give you props for figuring out the love part, but I said nothing about _who_ I loved. It certainly isn't _Sandpaw!_ That would be crazy! I can't love a tom! I'm a tom! It's uh, wrong!" He tried to channel Sandpaw's words when the tabby had exploded yesterday afternoon. It made his own stomach churn with regret as he tried to lie.

"Is it now?" Riverpaw drawled, brushing her tail against the soil. "Does that mean it was wrong for me to love a she-cat, even though I'm one as well?"

Bluepaw shifted uncomfortably. Her eerily calm tone was setting him on edge. "Er, of course! It's um, obvious! Tom to tom, or a she-cat to she-cat doesn't work in the sense of repopulating. It has to be a tom to a she-cat, and a she-cat to a tom. That's how it is."

"Who said anything to me about if I wanted to have kits?" Riverpaw retained her slate timbre, refusing to accept defeat and burst with emotions. "Yes, the Clan does need warriors, but I have no intention of being forced into a loveless pairing. I loved Swanpaw from the start. Don't tell me you didn't notice that when we were all but young and naive 'paws, I was uncharacteristically nice to Swanpaw. And only Swanpaw. I could never hurt her, I couldn't find it in my to snap at her."

Bluepaw blinked, "But what about when you attacked her during training the other day? That was hurting her, wasn't it?"

"Fish for brains," Riverpaw grumbled. "Haven't you figured it out yet? Swanpaw never loved me back. Yes, I said I love her and I still do, but when I told her my true intentions, she flipped. She flat out insulted me and how far I've fallen. She told me I had hopes at being a warrior but once I revealed to her my feelings, she only thought worse of me. True, I wouldn't have pounced on her during the training if she returned those feelings, but like I said, it was training- nothing major and she needed to know that I wouldn't hesitate to defend myself come time if we fought."

"You're kinda contradicting yourself," the tom observed, panicking that his statement would set her off.

"Am I?" she chuckled. "I guess I am. I lost sight of what I was and blindly leaped believing it was one of the others. Like I've said multiple times, I love her and never intended it. She probably saw it as an act of revenge for not loving me back, but it was a harmless mistake. Besides, it's not like I can apologize. She still hates me for what I am." Shaking her head free into the brief wind, her gaze returned to the other apprentice beside her. "Now, for your problem. In order to keep yourself from losing it, you need to accept the fact that Sandpaw's changed."

As Bluepaw opened his mouth to speak, the silver she-cat cut him off.

"Don't try to argue. I've seen the looks you two shared, not to mention the nose bumping. Don't even think I didn't see the nest sharing. You were cold? _Please._ "

Bluepaw jerked upright, startled. Then his features simply melded into an expression of embarrassment.

"You need to accept his change in status. He's moved on, you need to as well. Otherwise you'll just drive yourself into insanity. You'll be driven by grief over your loss and eventually lose your soul in the process."

Curling tighter, Bluepaw's head dropped. "How do you know this?" He murmured.

Voice strained and throat tight, the silver 'paw forced a shaky meow. "Because it almost happened to me. I nearly lost who I was. You remember the day I disappeared? That was the day Swanpaw rejected my advance. I ran away thinking it would help. Obviously, you can see it didn't. But once I returned, clear of mind and accepting that she wouldn't ever return to me, things got better and I was able to see her flaunt around the other males without popping a fuse. So you see how important it is for you to understand that he'll never come back to you. It's a hard step, but once you do that, things become gradually easier. You'll be able to love him from afar. It's the thought that counts."

"I'm glad we had this talk," Bluepaw admitted as he rose to his paw, dusting himself off. "It's helped clear the clouds from my mind."

Riverpaw smiled. "Anytime, sweet. As one lover of the same gender to another, you're welcome to come chat with me whenever you need it."

"I might take you up on that offer," chuckled the blue-gray. "But if you don't mind, I have a favor to ask of you."

"Anything."

"Could you maybe fetch Sandpaw and ask him to go to the Star Willow? It would mean the world to me." Bluepaw gazed at her hopefully with shimmering sapphires. He was relieved when Riverpaw nodded with a smile, "Of course. I suppose it holds some significance?"

The blue-eyed tom returned her nod as he began to meander away from the clearing. "Yes it does. It'll be the death of remorse and the birth of acceptance." As he disappeared through the surrounding foliage, Riverpaw turned away in search of the sandy tabby. For someone as smart as she was, it was surprising that she didn't pick up the hidden meaning in Bluepaw's departing words.

* * *

Emerald eyes narrowed, pawsteps light against the brittle blades of sun-dried grass. Shifting weight from each tender appendage, slinking with the utmost silence, the bronze ticked tabby retained his future prey within his sights. Ears furiously twitching, he was able to pinpoint his partner crawling around roots and around the trunks, placed to provide the final blow once the feathered fiend had decided to flee from its soon to be pursuer. As the final pounce was set to initiate, a loud resonating crash thundered from behind, startling the sparrow as it took off, out of reach from any swiping claws. Heads popped up from the crouch, Swanpaw peering from around one of the nearby tree trunks.

"Riverpaw, you'd better have a very good reason for scaring off my bird," Sandpaw griped, a strained glare containing his emotions of pure fury and will for retaliation.

"As a matter of fact I do," Riverpaw seated herself on the ground, licking a paw before running it over her ears. "I come bearing a message."

"Well?" Sandpaw prompted her. From her nook near the tree base, Swanpaw's ears twitched, genuinely curious.

"Sandpaw, you are instructed by Bluepaw to meet him at the Star Willow."

"Alright, messenger, I've got a message for you to take to Bluepaw," the tabby meowed, clearly cross. "Tell him, I'm not going to meet him anywhere. I've got an assignment to complete."

Riverpaw shook her head. "No can do. First of all, I'm not your messenger. Just because I have a message to give does not mean I'm going to pass back any of your petty squabbling thoughts. Just do me and him a favor and get your sorry behind up there or else I'm going to give you a fierce beating until you wished you listened to my offer in the first place."

Motionless as he registered her words of truth- no doubt she would carry through with her threats- Sandpaw gulped.

"Sandpaw, you're not going to listen to her lies, are you?" Swanpaw sounded incredulous. "We should just find another bird and move on. Who cares about Bluepaw?"

Looking her straight in her golden eyes, Sandpaw fixed her with a glare. "I care," he said simply, tearing off through the trees behind her. Whipping her head around, Swanpaw watched the tabby streak away, crashing through the scattered brush and disappearing from sight.

* * *

Clearing the ridge, Sandpaw scurried up to his full height, the breeze causing his whiskers to tremble. He shook out his windswept fur, attempting to flatten out any kinks he ad gathered during his sprint up the earthy slope. Sandpaw was guided towards squinting in order to seek out what was so important. With a sharp green gaze on his side, he was able to identify the cleared expanse of flattened grass, sunlight speckles, the willow tree, its drooping branches overhanging the glittering pool, the lump of blue-gray floating motionless within, and the surrounding flowers in full bloom.

Wait...

Blue-gray lump...?

 _Bluepaw!_ Sandpaw's voice caught in his throat, unable to speak as he instinctively rocketed forward, forced to lose control of his actions. Paws skimming the grass path, the blood pounded to his ears. It was hard to think, difficult to act with a calm mind when all of your nerves were shot beyond repair. Heart beating quicker and quicker with adrenaline, Sandpaw's now moon-shaped orbs registered the pool growing closer, every bound creating less distance between him and his goal. As everything seemed to morph into a slower motion, Sandpaw initiated the final bounce from the water's edge to the pool's center, managing to land a few paddles away from the bobbing blob.

Cold water hit sunlight warmed fur, sending a wave of tingles through his already shaking nerves. Struggling not to inhale the splash, the tom wavered around aimlessly until he was successful in opening his eyes fully. Once opened, his jaws instantly lunged for the clump of fur, feeling around where it then found a secure grip around his scruff. Muscles straining, Sandpaw hauled the heavier mass towards the edge. Panting, heaving and some serious muscle work later, the sandy tom was able to properly observe the said lump on solid ground.

It was definitely Bluepaw. No doubting it. No other cat had blue fur like he did. The small freckles of white that dotted between his sprawled out legs were also a dead giveaway. He somehow looked so peaceful laying out on his back, yet at the same time vulnerable and helpless. It was also then Sandpaw realized how awkward his observations were.

 _Mind out of the algae!_ Sandpaw swung his head from side to side, dragging his less than adequate thoughts from the muck. Quickly placing his paws on Bluepaw's immobile chest, he began pressing down harshly in swift motions. The paralyzed apprentice jolted with every hit but the water in his lungs refused to spew out.

 _If only you hadn't been so distracted from the start,_ Sandpaw yelled at himself, pushing his paws in a downward motion. _If you had immediately gone to here first, maybe he might still have a chance...No, don't think like that. I'll kill myself before letting Bluepaw die here at my paws. I've come to far with this kit to let him join StarClan now._

"Come on, you sick twisted waste of fur!" he resorted to insults, hoping that his voice would be heard. "Come on! There's no chance I'm letting you go here and now! Was this why you wanted me to come here? Was this your insidious plot? Did you really order me here so I could watch you wither away? Come on! Come on!" As water threatened to filter from his glassy eyes, a shuddering cough started the flooding of previously ingested liquid from the weaker's parted jaw. Startled, Sandpaw backed up off of Bluepaw, watching with surprise as the blue-gray rolled to his side, continuing to spit. He shivered for a few moments, added by a revolting retching sound as he hurled the contents of his stomach.

Sandpaw cringed, looking away. Maybe it would've been better to let him go instead of suffer like this. "You OK there, Blue?"

Bluepaw didn't answer verbally, his insides insisting to spew out leading to unpleasant moaning. In addition to his soaked pelt, within seconds, dark sapphires began to swell with unshed tears. The last of his breakfast escaped by ways of spitting, leaving the host a quivering, sobbing heap.

"Oh, Blue," Sandpaw murmured softly, advancing closer to the point where the tabby had coiled himself around his former lover, gingerly stroking his back with his feathery tail. "Shh, it's OK. Trust me. Trust me, it'll all be OK."

He must have hit a nerve by the sudden way Bluepaw jerked away from Sandpaw's grip. "Trust?" he snarled, fury alight in his narrowed cobalt glare. "Trust you? Why in StarClan's name would I trust you? _You_ betrayed me. _You_ were the one who left me alone. _You_ were the one who abandoned me. _You_ were the one who dishonored everything we had as kits. _You_ were the one who chose _Swanpaw._ " He spat her name as if it were rancid crowfood."

With every enunciation, the bronze marked tabby visibly flinched. He'd never seen this side of Bluepaw before. He'd always been so happy and cheerful, seeming to prove the fact that nothing could make his smile falter. _I guess even the sweetest seeming cats can have dark hearts._

He wanted to speak, but Bluepaw cut him off. With an exhausted sigh, his tense figure relaxed, slumping to the wet earth beneath him. "I didn't come here to yell at you," he admitted. "I came here to accept the fact that you were with Swanpaw. Recently I had a very in depth conversation with a friend. They helped me see the light at the end of the tunnel. And I always thought I was the light at the end to your tunnel. It took me some time, but then I realized- I wasn't the light. I was the rock in the way. I was the stubborn rock that hid the light from you. So, me in the pool? That was my way of accepting you've moved on. If I was gone, you wouldn't have to deal with guilt about spending time with Swanpaw."

"You did that for me?" Sandpaw's throat clenched, vocals going hoarse.

"Well duh," Bluepaw chuckled as he shifted weight up to his paws, turning himself away as if to end the conversation. "You've taken my heart but I see that yours is given to someone else. I respect that, and only wish for you to be happy." He flashed him a small grin, circling around back towards the direction of camp.

Run over with a series of jumbled emotions, Sandpaw couldn't stop himself from starting to twitch.

"Wait!"

Bluepaw's crown pivoted, stealing a glance over his shoulder. "Yes?" he meowed expectantly.

"I love you!" the tabby blurted, successfully widening Bluepaw's eyes.

"What was that?" he blinked, flustered.

"Don't make me say it again," Sandpaw muttered, slumping down with discomfort. His emeralds darted from his shuffling paws, to his twitching tail, to the leaves above them...anywhere but Bluepaw. The heat rose to his face, his cheeks and ear tips growing considerably warmer.

Shaking his sodden head, Bluepaw murmured with his expression back under control, "Sandpaw, get a hold of your emotions. You can't just say that and expect me to come crawling back. I know you belong with Swanpaw. Good day."

Watching him pad away earned a very visible jolt in Sandpaw's stance. The embarrassment had now been replaced with confusion and irritation. So Bluepaw was allowed to express his feelings freely but once Sandpaw wanted to speak his mind, he was shunned? What was this sick joke? One thing for certain, he wasn't going to let Bluepaw have the solo satisfaction of speaking from the heart.

Lunging to a crouch, Sandpaw pounced for the moving shape, twisting and tackling him to the ground earning a flabbergasted grunt as the shorter 'paw was slammed on his back. Groaning, he looked up where sapphires met emeralds in a stare off. "Um, Sandpaw?" Bluepaw started to writhe under the other's harsh grasp. "If you wouldn't mind stepping off, it's a little unnerving."

"You think you can just walk away after admitting everything to me? You think you can just spill your guts and leave without giving me a chance to reply?" Sandpaw growled, voice low at first but gradually gaining more volume. "Well let me tell you something- that's not how it works!"

Bluepaw struggled but to no avail. As much as he would hate to admit it, Sandpaw was the stronger one of the two. If Sandpaw had him pinned, it was expected that he wouldn't let go until his point was made. "Sandpaw, I- "

"Shut it!" he snapped. "And listen to me! It took me a considerably long time to figure out where my heart lay. From the early days, I had developed a bond with you. Overtime, that same bond only grew stronger with every passing moment we spent together. Then, it happened. It started with simple looks. Fleeting glances from one another as we passed by on the training hollow or heading to the prey heap for a meal. Following that came more affectionate actions. The shoulder bumps, play fighting, even the nose taps. From then on it just fed my desire. No matter how much I denied it, I did enjoy the warmth you ratiated during the time we shared a nest. I'll admit, it does make me feel a bit hollow inside now that you stick to your own side of the den."

Bluepaw remained quiet, ears perked as he listened for the continuation.

"To put it bluntly, all I'm trying to say is...I am deeply in love with you, Bluepaw. Always have, it just took me some time to figure it out. And I will stop loving you when the sun glows green, when the grass grows red, and when the ocean dries up."

"But that'll never happen," Bluepaw pointed out, feeling the confusion in his head.

Sandpaw purred. "Exactly. Which means my love for you is eternal and will never change."

A smile weaseled its way onto the pinned apprentice's muzzle, quickly replaced with a frown once understanding a certain question. "But what about Swanpaw? Surely she still means something to you?"

"Screw Swanpaw," Sandpaw huffed, eyes flickering with annoyance. "I only befriended her to try and fill the hole in my heart after I, regrettably, abandoned you. I can't believe it took me this long to understand. My head told me logic, but to achieve happiness I had to listen to my heart."

"Listen to you and your lovey dovey heartfelt moments," Bluepaw teased, leaning up to bump muzzles. Sandpaw gave another huff, ears pinned back in mock disgust. "Never thought you had it in you to talk like this. Guess that's just why I like you. Just the way you are."

"So...you accept that's the way I am?" Sandpaw turned a hopeful glance down at his captive beneath his paws.

"Of course. Smelly fur and all."

Sandpaw was quick to defend. "I do not have smelly fur!" he howled, stepping off. Bluepaw giggled, rising to his paws. "Do too. When you come back from the dirtplace."

"Well duh, fish for brains!" the tabby retaliated. "I'd like to see you walk in there without reeking like a rutting pile of crowfood!" The bronze striped tabby sprung, playfully ramming the blue-gray's side. Their antics continued until both were out of breath, collapsed on the earth.

"Hey, Sandpaw?" Bluepaw wheezed.

"Hmm?" answered the shuddering voice of the adjacent tabby tom.

"I love you..." his voice sounded shy, as if adjusting to Sandpaw's full acceptance to their former dilemma.

"Love you too, Blue."

* * *

"There's your proof," a silver she-cat whispered to her white furred companion at her side, both hunkered down under a holly bush as they watched the unrehearsed show play before their eyes. "They truly do love each other."

"I refuse to believe it, Riverpaw," came the muted hissing of the golden-eyed. "You set them up."

"Hardly, Swanpaw," the other she-cat sighed, eyes rolling. "Did you not see what was happening? The angst, the tears, the anger, the drama, heartfelt flashbacks, reminiscing each other's company, friendship bonding, humor, love...all the makings of a perfect couple."

"Tsh, you'd say that," Swanpaw growled, seeming to adopt Riverpaw's personality.

"Just accept it Swanpaw," Riverpaw placed her paw upon her compatriot's. "If you let grief drive you, you'll only end up losing yourself."

"Better than being stuck with someone like you," Swanpaw gave a sharp hiss, yanking her appendage away from Riverpaw's as if it were some form of contagious disease. Snapping to her paws in an abrupt motion, her golden glare bore into Riverpaw's blue before she slipped under the leaves and darted away.

 _Even if you push me away, I'll still love you from afar._ Casting a glance to the snoozing pair by the water, she smiled. _I wish you eternal happiness._

* * *

 _8,000 WORDS EXACTLY! HOLY CRAP! I'm...I'm exhausted honestly. XD Had I the chance, I would've written more. Like literally a hundred words more. Curse you word limit! But since I'm just one for following the rules... There you go CloudClan! There's your 8,000 word limit monthly challenge. My god was that a pain to write. And here I thought writing a 4,000 word chapter is difficult. Seeing as this will be up on the 10th, this means this wonderful piece of literature took me ten ducking days. That may seem short for a time limit of a thirty days, but if I had really set my mind to it, this would've been completed like the day after. In other words, it would've been finished by the 2nd. This just proves I can be lazy. XD_

 _Also, if you notice my insanely creative humor...the prompt was titled_ You Give Love a Bad Name. _See where the title fits in there? Yeah, haha, I'm hilarious._

 _But anyways, for those who aren't members of CloudClan, this was my take on our monthly challenge for August. I'd love to hear what you think, both from fellow Cloudians and fellow members of the writing community._

 _Ah...ooh...ah...I...I...I'm going to go flop on the floor and probably eat some ice cream. I need a long break...Ta ta my lovely readers, until I find the energy to write again :P_

 _\- Snarky_

 _~ Ravendusk of CloudClan_


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